This post was written by Mark and Kendra Rohl. Mark is an elder and worship leader at Life Connection Church in Phoenix AZ and Kendra sings on the Our Rising Sound band. Previously as part of the “God in Our Worst Times” blog series they shared their struggle of having their own baby and their hope of adoption. That post ended with hope and faith, but a yet unrealized miracle. By the grace of God they are now able to share the conclusion to their story, and the amazing miracle that God gave them.

God in Our Best Times

January was an exciting month for Mark and I. We had selected an amazing Christian Adoption Agency here in Phoenix called CFCA and started our 8 weeks of infant adoption/parenting classes! It felt great to be in the process and taking steps forward. We went into the matchbook at the end of June and we were told it would probably be a 6mo – 1yr wait time. We were hopeful, excited and full of faith that God had the perfect birth mom and baby for us. We spent many nights calling out to God on her behalf and praying that we would be able to form a good relationship with her, that the baby would be safe and healthy in her womb, that we would be able to share Christ with her and that ultimately she would become part of His family and ours. We could never have dreamed of how completely, perfectly and faithfully God would answer those prayers.

We receive “The Call”

On Monday Aug. 3rd we got a call from CFCA that a birth mom had selected us and wanted to have a match meeting with us to get to know us better. She was due at the end of Sept. which seemed so fast but we were so excited! We prayed and thanked God and asked that if this was meant to be that He would make it perfectly clear. Although we were both very excited we just didn’t have a peace about things and didn’t feel like this match was going to come to fruition.

The next day we were telling everyone the exciting news about our potential match and the word was out and our amazing community of friends and family were in prayer for us that God would continue to open the right doors and shut the others. Tuesday night as we were getting ready to go to church Mark got a call on his cell. All I heard him say was hospital, Tucson and as I looked at him to see his shocked face he put the woman on speakerphone

“Hi, this is Susan from CFCA Tucson and we have a birth mom here that is in labor and she has selected you from the matchbook, can you be here right away?“

What!  We were both in complete shock, we wandered around our our bedroom listening to the details she knew “healthy mom, healthy baby from the ultrasound it looks to be a girl, no prenatal, ethnicity 1/2 Italian 1/4 Irish 1/4 Hispanic.” She asked us to take a minute to pray and call her back if we were interested. We hung up the phone and just sobbed on the floor of our bedroom. We instantly knew that this was it! We threw some random things into a suitcase, got in the car and we were off to Tucson to see what the future had in store for us.

It’s a boy!

On the way there we called the adoption worker back and she said “Well the baby was just born and it’s a boy!  he is perfect,  healthy and beautiful and the birth mom would like to talk to you, is that okay?” Wow, sure I said not knowing what to say to this brave woman or how to even pull myself together to sound like a halfway sane woman myself.  She got on the phone and told me how excited she was that we were coming, how she knew from the moment she saw our match letter that we were the ones God had sent her to raise this baby boy, and the words that changed our world in an instant “I can’t wait for you to meet your son, he is beautiful.”

Our son? Could it be? Could this be the long awaited arrival of our child? The one we have been fighting for, praying for, crying out and believing for? It was too beautiful to comprehend, so full of God’s grace and peace that all we could do was burst into worship to Jesus. Worshiping Him for His goodness and faithfulness not even knowing how much more He had in store for us. The ride to Tucson was filled with lots of tears, lots of laughter, prayer, worship and conversations I will never forget with family and friends with Jesus at the center of it all. We didn’t have a boy name yet so being the tech savvy people that we are Mark downloaded a baby name app onto his iPhone to start looking at names. Mark has always loved the name Toby and I have always loved the proper version of that, Tobias. He looked it up and it means God’s Goodness. Done! That was the perfect name for this little boy.

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This post was written by Dave Negron. Dave and his wife Denise have been married for 9 years and they have 4 beautiful children. They are both Connection Group leaders at Life Connection Church in Phoenix AZ.

“I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO MY FAMILY”

Those were the words I said when I was 8yrs old. All I could hear was my mom yelling and my dad yelling back. I remember running to my bedroom, jumping on my bunk bed, and praying, “God please don’t let my parents ever divorce.” Fast forward to Dec. 30 1991 my 14th birthday. I was in Arizona visiting my aunt. When I heard the phone ring I knew something was wrong. My aunt began talking loud trying to calm my mom down. She gave me the phone and my mom said your father has left and is not coming back. The next day I was on a plane back to California. I had front row seats to see what adultery does in a home, a “Christian home” that is. I told myself I would never do that to my family.

April 10,1999 I’m getting married to the most beautiful woman in the world. We were high school sweethearts and I knew this was going to be perfect. I’ve always thought I knew how to be a husband and a father; I just needed to not do what my dad did. Easy.

3 months after getting married we were pregnant. No time was there to be alone for us. After Valerie was born in 2000 we had Alexis in 2002 and Ezekiel in 2004. Everything was going great, at least that’s what I believed.

Marriage troubles begin

In July 2003 I started this cycle of running from my problems and started to disconnect myself from the family. I tried maintaining 2 jobs just to stay out of the house because all I thought was that was my role in the home, bring in the money. During multiple moves back and forth from Arizona and California it became clearer and clearer that my marriage wasn’t right. My wife Denise is not happy. All of our problems or fights were financially based. I didn’t think she should be telling me what I needed to do. I made the money so I can spend it whenever and however I wanted to.

This continued for 3 years. In July of 2006 on my way home from work I remember the Lord speaking to my spirit warning me that if I didn’t repent I was going to lose my family and everything I have. I thought about it but no action took place.

The first week in November 2006 I was stressing out about money. A debt collector just attached my wages and I wasn’t bringing home the money. The night before Denise and I got in a huge fight and she threw out the word DIVORCE. I called her bluff.

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This post was written by Jason Whitehorn. Jason is a worship leader at FBC Smyrna in Tennessee and tells the story below of getting through the tragic death of his grandfather.

“My grandfather is dead”

Who would have ever thought that the month of February in 2004 would be as cold as it was? The physical temperature was fine with highs between the 50’s and 60’s…but the chill I felt that February was numbing. I had come home from work and was doing some relaxing on the couch when my phone rang. To this day, I can’t remember if it was my mother or father who called…and I don’t remember the exact words said to me…but I remember being told a simple sentence that translated to “my grandfather is dead.” I vaguely remember not being able to speak and tossing the phone aside at the couch. My wife picked up the phone while I cried my heart into the couch cushions.

The details were chilling. My grandfather had spent the morning cleaning up after himself so my grandmother would not have to do any cleaning when she got home. She had gone to see a family member in the hospital. He changed clothes into an old t-shirt and an old pair of pants and went out into his garage. He had placed a note on the kitchen refrigerator – a note that we would later discover he had written well before the fateful day. He sat down on his favorite glider in the garage – and performed the unthinkable act.

After the initial shock wore off, my mind went where I am sure everyone’s mind goes: Why? Could I have prevented it? What happens to my grandfather now? Signs! There were no signs! How could we have missed this?!? I spent my next few months struggling with these thoughts and emotions.

Dealing with the guilt

Perhaps you have deal with or are currently dealing with the same issue. Perhaps you know someone who is dealing with the same issue. The quiet truth that I can provide to you is that God can heal your heart – and he provides us with many words in the Scriptures that answer many of our questions. It is easy to wonder “Why didn’t I see this coming?” or “could I have prevented this?” when dealing with the suicide of a loved one or friend. The truth is – it is rarely ever made known. I never knew that my grandfather was that upset with life. It turned out that he was going to have surgery on his hips and be confined to wheelchair for a short period of time. My grandfather simply did not want to subject his wife to his pain nor subject her to having to push him around and care for him. There were no signs…there was no idle talk…nor talk at all about suicide.

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This post was written by Mark and Kendra Rohl. Mark is an elder and worship leader at Life Connection Church in Phoenix AZ and Kendra sings on the Our Rising Sound band. They tell the story below of their struggles to start their own family by having children of their own.

Beginning a family

It was the best of times it was the worst of times.  Those words ring true for us as we have headed down the path towards parenthood.  The last three and a half years have been filled with anticipation, hope, heartbreak, loss, joy and redemption and the story is still being written. The decision to start a family is a scary and exciting decision for any young couple and we were no exception. After 4 years of marriage we felt God was leading us to be fruitful and multiply and we wanted to be obedient to the Lord of course so try we did! The first few months were exciting and with every twinge of nausea we thought we were pregnant. Then a few more months went by but without much concern, everyone told us to just be patient, try eating peanut butter or oysters or any number of strange magic fertility enhancing foods (it’s really quite fascinating how all of a sudden everyone becomes an expert on the subject and has lots of advice to give on how to make a baby).  But we were not worried and continued the old fashioned way with full confidence that at any moment we would be peeing on sticks and seeing pink plus signs.

Approaching the 1 yr mark our hope was turning into frustration so we thought maybe we just weren’t timing things right or taking the right vitamins so we got the gadgets and gizmos that help you to know your cycles and so forth. I won’t go into all the gory details but for anyone who has tried to make a baby you know the crazy lengths you will go to and try every bizarre thing anyone recommends when you get to the point of desperation. After a few more months of that we decided it was time to head to the docs for a check up and see if anything was causing this seemingly epic delay in procreation.

Doctors start testing

Mark was the first to get tested (wow, the process of that was another interesting moment in our marriage we never thought we would experience) and much to our surprise his tests came back as infertile, what, infertile? How can that be we thought. The doctors said there was no explanation for how this could have happened, no hope for any sort of cure and we spent a while reeling from that blow. We went through the cycle of sadness, then anger, then bitterness and finally landed in fight mode. We weren’t going to give up this easy and we knew God could do a miracle so that is what we prayed for. We had prophetic words about God restoring the seed of life in Mark and we clung to that and had our amazing friends and family praying and interceding for that to take place.

In the meantime, the doctors wanted to test me just to make sure we didn’t have the double whammy of infertility happening, and low and behold we did. After a painful procedure and testing that was more like torture than anything else we discovered that a ruptured appendix when I was in high school caused massive scar tissue to form around my fallopian tubes causing them to be completely blocked. Awesome, we now were faced with both of us being diagnosed as infertile in our 20′s with no hope (according to the docs) of ever conceiving naturally. It’s a strange feeling to have someone tell you that you can’t have children, it feels like some right has been taken from you and it all seems so unjust. There was a period of time when we could barely go out in public because of the seemingly innumerable amounts of pregnant teens walking around looking pissed and disgusted at the gift of life inside of them.

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This post was written by Scot Longyear. Scot is the Lead Pastor of Exchange which is part of Maryland Community Church where Scot is a Sr. Associate Pastor.

“Jerry Turley is dead.“

I stared across the desk at my boss and Sr Pastor as he said the words.
“I just got a call that Jerry died in his sleep last night.”

I felt like I was instantly in another world.  “Jerry Turley?  Who the heck is Jerry Turley?”
Then it hit.  Like somebody dropped a bag of concrete on my gut.  Jerry Turley, my friend.  Jerry, our drummer.  Jerry, who we had written and recorded songs with.  Jerry who we had done several gigs with.  Jerry, one the most gentle guys in the word.  Jerry a lover of Jesus.  Dead.

Jerry was just short of 40 years old.  One evening he went for a bike ride with his girlfriend.  He kissed her goodnight and she went home.  It was the last time Jerry would kiss.  He died hours later in his sleep.

Jerry’s mom asked me to speak at the funeral.  I had to decline.  I was a mess.  There is a special bond that band people share.  Few may understand it.  When you create, play, laugh, worship, and rock together, there is something magical that happens.  That bond was broken and so was I.  I bawled thru the entire funeral.  My band mates and I grabbed the casket and carried it out the door and slid it in the hearse.  You never dream that you will be pallbearer for one of your friends.

I remember the days that followed.  One minute I would laugh, the next I would cry.  One morning after his death, I remember staring at the clothes in my closet.  The next thing I knew I was literally on the floor, bawling like a baby.  I missed Jerry.

It has been 10 years, and I still miss him.

I was in uncharted territory.  Jerry was the drummer for our band, Fish in the Sand.  Fish was the house band for a new and growing ministry called exchange.  The ministry was young and we were the only musicians and the only band.  As the leader I felt this pressure to keep things going.  How could we keep going with a crippled band?  My friends and bad-mates decided that the best thing to do was to take a few weeks off from worship leading.  We needed some time, and the church was gracious to allow us that.

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This post was written by Josh and Christy Dailey. They serve as youth pastors at Life Connection Church in Phoenix AZ and have 3 children. They tell the story below of how they almost lost their first born son when he was struck by a truck.

One evening, my husband and I were sitting in our home after putting our two children to sleep for the night. Josh and I were so blessed with our then two-year-old son, Ethan, and six-month-old daughter, Avden. Knowing that our children were called and purposed for the Lord, we want to raise them according to His plan for their lives. This particular evening, we were praying for our first-born son, inquiring of the Father as to what Ethan would become. The words we received from the Lord were near identical:

“He (Ethan) is meant to impact the nations. This is not a cliche for him. Though he is young, he has been given a wise spirit.     He is strong (the name Ethan is translated  “Firm; Strong”). He will be My voice”.

Saturday, August 27, 2005, about 2 weeks after hearing from the Lord regarding our son, began with great excitement. I had been working at a juice and smoothie shop, which was owned by my two older brothers, for most of the day and evening, and was getting prepared for a very special “Open Mic Night” event. The space was pretty packed out with customers who were enjoying the night of delicious beverage and the talents of various town-folk. As the night wound down, mostly only our closest friends still remained to hear the final band, which consisted of my two brothers and Josh. Feeling content with the day’s work, I decided to clock-out and join my friends and hold my children.

As soon as I walked out from behind the counter, I grabbed my little boy and gave him the hug of a mother who hadn’t seen her son all day. I loved holding his tiny body, as Ethan is fairly small for his age. I carried him to the front of the store and took a seat next to a friend who was holding my baby girl. It was nearing 9:00pm and Avden was getting fussy with sleepiness. As I put Ethan on his feet, I took Avden and rocked her gently to the melody that was being played. Feeling her begin to calm, I turn to look towards the back of the store where I thought Ethan had gone to play with some other kids. I can’t see him. I stretch my neck farther, lean back and forth, to get a better view… I can’t find him.

Ethan is hit head on by a truck

At that moment, a young man comes running through the front doors in obvious panic. “Please call 9-1-1. A kid was just hit by a car!” Right away, I knew that that kid was my son. “No…“, I thought.  I couldn’t seem to get outside fast enough. With my baby still in my arms, I find myself on the sidewalk outside. I turn to the left and see an image that will haunt me to this day.

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Next week we’ll be starting a new blog series called “God in Our Worst Times.” This will be a series of guest posts from some of my dearest friends who have gone through some of life’s most difficult, painful experiences. The goal is not to just share these moments, but to demonstrate the goodness of God in them and how God brought them through it. The stories range from a friend’s death, to a family’s 3yr old being hit by a car, to a couple’s long battle to get pregnant, to others dealing with business and marriage.

This will be a difficult series, but after reading these stories I can promise you it will be one of the most encouraging, rewarding and spiritually beneficial series this blog has ever done. I was reading one of the posts yesterday while eating breakfast at a restaurant and I could not stop crying. It was embarrassing but I think you’ll understand when you read it for yourself. So make sure you are subscribed to the rss feed or subscribed via email so you don’t miss any of these posts.

I don’t claim to be the Associated Press of all that is Christian music. Sometimes I arrive at the scene a little late, this would be one of those times, but I don’t think too many people knew about this. One of my favorite bands in the 90s was Superdrag, they are best known for their hit “Sucked Out” off their cd “Regretfully Yours”. I saw them live with Ben Folds Five and that show to this day goes down as one of my all time favorites.

John Davis founded the band, led on vocals and guitar. Incredible songwriter, incredible rock voice, killer guitar work, what else can you say, dude was just a flat out rock star. He also lived the life of a rock star and hit rock bottom. One night, prior to the release of their last album, while driving to his parent’s house Davis pulled over and prayed to God. John said he felt God answered him right there and it was life changing for him. John sobered up and soon left the band.

John’s latest solo album Arigato is awesome. It has a lot of the Superdrag grit but lyrically he’s all about talking about the greatness of God. It’s amazing to hear modern day Damascus road stories and to see the fruit of that experience lived out in someone’s life. Go check John out on myspace, I’ll be working on getting an interview with him. Oh and Superdrag is reuniting and releasing a new cd….yes!

On January 8th, 2008, John Davis announced on the Superdrag news section that the band is reunited indefinitely, stating that “Superdrag’s original line-up will reconvene in the recording studio in February to begin work on our first new recording project together since 1998′s Head Trip In Every Key.”